February 13, 2010

Peace

Posted in life, thoughts of mine at 12:13 am by ammiejo

Philippians 4:6-7 Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

This time of year is always hard for me. I hadn’t realized that before. But in looking back through my prayer journals (hand written ones) I noticed this pattern. I start doubting my choices of homeschooling, staying at home, of just being who I know God has called me to be. My patience is thin and my attitude tends toward the really stinky negative side. I draw inside myself. I would rather stay at home than go out socially. I have trouble sleeping. I tend toward the emotional. But if I can just hold on for a bit longer…until March or April, I’m fine. But these first couple of months of the year are just hard. They just are.

I’ve also noticed that during this time, I pray more. A bit because I’m desperately seeking a way out of how I feel inside. But more because I know where my peace comes from. I know what the Source is.

The question “Do you believe in ghosts?” from last Fridays Five Question Friday by Mama M really sparked some conversations in our home. It was during one of those conversations I remembered the verse Ephesians 6:12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. And I used this verse to talk to our boys about that question. But it stuck in my head and it made me think of the struggle that I am dealing with. I don’t want to lessen how I feel, but I don’t want to give it that much weight either.

So that’s what I’m dealing with right now. It feels unbelievably heavy, but I know the God who gives me peace. And so I’ll keep my heart and mind on Jesus Christ.

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6 Comments »

  1. I’m sorry you’re struggling right now!

    It is really common for homeschool moms to hit this wall in February. The homeschool blogs and forums i visit (or used to) almost always talk about “February Burnout.” After 6 months of schooling, we often get tired. It’s pretty common. I think the only reason I don’t have the same thing going on (at least I don’t remember it… definitely not in the last many years) is that we take a LONG break between Thanksgiving and New Year. We’ve only been back to school since early January, so I’m not burned out

    But you’re right… those principalities and powers will take advantage of this common time of burnout and struggle. There is much advice out there for dealing with it (shaking things up, going outdoors regularly, etc.) but I think being in prayer and waging a battle is key. You’re right. You can’t ignore it, but don’t let it have power over you. Hang on! Spring is in sight!

    • ammiejo said,

      Thank you! We are shaking things up a bit and now that our weather is getting a bit warmer, being outside is so nice! I continue to pray!
      Miss you friend!

  2. Shelley Buffett said,

    I was beginning to think I was the only one. It is relief to know that this is a common struggle. I thank you for sharing this.

  3. ammiejo said,

    I’m glad I did Shelly! It felt good to put a voice to what I was feeling! I’ll include you in my prayers!

    AmmieJo

  4. Amy said,

    Hmmm, and here I am wondering if I can handle being a student and homeschooling mine at the same time. Co-ing-kee-dink??

    I think a lot of people burn out in general this time of year. It’s not quite the equinox, and we’re tired of the short days. Sunlight provides us with the vitamin D, AND it’s just good for the soul. It’s why I like to travel way down south in February. It makes the stretch to Spring easier to bear.

    You’re doing all the right things! Keep running the race! Romans 6. 🙂

  5. Rachel said,

    I am not a full-time homeschooling mommy… just parttime with Calvin. I too have felt the “burn out” and struggle with staying motivated. I will keep you in my prayers for rejuvination and lots of sunshine! 🙂


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